Some thoughts

Courage... This was a charm I bought before Brandon left. I bought one for both he & I to wear. He has his on a set of dogtags & I have mine as you see here. Why did I choose this charm of all the ones that were available? Why not choose something like "Love", "Forever", "Strength", or another endearing term? Well, this stuck out to me & I wanted something for the deployment ahead. So I bought "Courage". I had not yet figured out why I felt to buy this particular one...until recently. When I was faced with the very real fact that Brandon might not come home for Eliyahna's birth, it was courage I needed to face my first natural delivery alone. I wouldn't wish that upon anyone! Then, it was courage that I needed when Brandon left & I've had to re-adjust to being alone again but now with 2 babies, one who would daily act out in disobedience. So, now again I am faced with needing courage as I pull through this last stretch of separation from Brandon. It has not been easy in ANY WAY. It has been the complete opposite. I feel like so much is coming against us & it is courage that I need to get through each day until Brandon comes home.

Here is Gami trying to climb up so he can see his baby sister, whom he loves so much! If she cries & he's awake, he goes in to her. I love to see how affectionate he is towards her. I have the daily challenge of gearing him towards safety & gentleness with his sister, but not causing jealousy.

Here is Eliyahna as sweet as can be and about ready to fall asleep. She cries to sleep unless she's sleeping on my chest or in my Moby Wrap sling. This little girl loves her Ima!

Here is Gami watching Sesame Street this morning so I could check my emails from Brandon. It made me very sad that Gami didn't talk to Brandon when he had the chance to this morning. Brandon will not be calling back again today due to army stuff. But as I type this, Gami is "talking" on the cordless phone & saying "Abba". It makes me so sad, but happy to know that Gami surely knows who his Abba is!

Shalom,
Cassy